The Drama… Of The OES Fantasy Basketball League by Brian Eisner

Although OES’s fantasy football league has grabbed coverage with its gripping story that was ran in The Dig a bit ago, the OES fantasy basketball league has much more drama. For one, the divisions that were set up at the start of the league were the White, Asian, and Indian divisions (the multi-ethnic basketball enthusiasts found this humorous). Anyways, the teams, the teams!

 We will start with the current last-place team: Arjun Ratnam’s team. During the draft, he made a horrible mistake in trading away his first-round pick, and he has never been able to recover. It really didn’t help that his team had six players injured at one point. With his first win a few weeks ago, maybe his team has turned the corner? We shall see. Although I don’t have high hopes. I mean, he picked Kobe in the second round, what do you expect?

We then move to the other two cellar dwellers: Spencer Slovakians and Ball So Hard University (Otto’s very wonderfully creative name). Spencer made an early season blunder by trading away Stephen Curry, his first-round pick, for Serge Ibaka, and his team has never really recovered. Otto also made some trading mistakes, such as trading away Klay Thompson for Tim Duncan. Surprisingly, Spencer, one of the veteran fantasy players in the league, has just had problems getting his team to do well, although he has picked it up in recent weeks. I do have high hopes for his team, as he was one of the people hit hardest by the injury bug.

Now we will take a look at the two other teams below 500: Vinay Iyengar’s team and “Ha Ha Haugh,” Kevin Haugh’s appropriately named team. Vinay is currently the sole member of the league who does not set his lineups, so I guess it makes sense that he’s low, even though his team is pretty good. Kevin’s team is good, so it’s quite a mystery why he’s so low…well maybe he’ll pick it up later. Despite being a newcomer to fantasy basketball, Kevin’s team isn’t half bad! Hmm…

Next up are the teams above 500: Jack Halsey, Harrison Hiraki, and Josh Yuan. Harrison’s team, despite a terrible star to the season, has picked it up in recent weeks, and is now at 500, even with Deron Williams as his first round pick! Josh, on the other hand, had a great start to the season, but has fallen off the radar in recent weeks. What happened? Not injuries. Who knows? Well we’ll see if he rebounds (ba dum tsss). Jack Halsey, despite not having a good team at all, has avoided the injury bug that’s hit nearly everybody else in the league, and thus is doing well. With many players coming back, we’ll see if he remains above 500.

Now, to the top 4 teams in the league. We will do an in-depth analysis of each team, starting with the 4th place team: Harsha Uppili. Despite having a record of 9-2, good for second in the league, he is still not first in the India division, sitting behind Vijay. However, in terms of raw talent, his team may be the best in the league. Between drafting Isaiah Thomas in the 10th round, Spencer Hawes in the 8th, and Gordon Hayward in the 7th, he may have had the best draft in the league. Yet he continues to languish behind his division leader. Why? Well, he has been hit by the injury bug I guess, with Russell Westbrook out…

Now, the 3rd place team, the ACBREEZY15 ISLANDERS! Guess who’s team this is; it shouldn’t be hard. However, his team is slightly different from the other top teams. While he had an insane start to the season, he has cooled off lately, and over the last few weeks has actually averaged only around a 500 record. So what has been the reason for this decline? Well, he had only an average draft, and the Asia division, which he played at first, is rather meh. However, he plays the Asia division much more than others, so maybe he can rebound. We shall see.

The 2nd place team is obviously awesome, since it’s mine <arrogance>! To be perfectly honest, I don’t know how I’m this high; when you look at my team compared to others, it seems worse, with no guaranteed all-stars. However, my team has depth. Between getting Luol Deng in the 6th round and picking up lots of talent off the free agent market, the team may be the deepest in the league. In addition, with the pickup of Rajon Rondo off the waiver wire and no more games against the tough India division, the team is looking at a bright future.

Finally, the 1st place team, owned by none other than Vijay Edupuganti, the fantasy veteran if there ever was one. With a fantasy golf team even, this man is the fantasy resident player of OES, so it’s no surprise that his team is in 1st. With getting Stephen Curry in a trade, having by far the most free agent adds of the season, and having a good draft, it’s no surprise that his team is the best in the league. About his only problem is that he plays in the India division, which is by far the hardest division. However, he is looking likely to win the championship right now.

So there you have the standings, and you can now forever judge the players for how well they do, if you so choose.

Addendum: Well last week may have been the most dramatic of the weeks of the league, with 3 upsets of top teams. Aaron lost to Arjun, I lost to Spencer, and Vijay tied with Josh. We nearly had a 4th upset when Harsha very narrowly beat Otto! This should definitely shake up the league, and who knows what will come in the weeks to come! Tune in later to find out! /I’m signing off.

One thought on “The Drama… Of The OES Fantasy Basketball League by Brian Eisner

  1. I would like to notify the author of a number of inaccuracies and logical fallacies he has made in the above article. First of all, Arjun Ratnam had 7, not 6, injured players at one time. As for his trade of his first-round pick, he received Derrick Rose, not a bad pick at the time (until injury), and Anthony Davis, perhaps one of the best players in the league. Therefore, I would hesitate to say that the trade of the first-round pick was a “horrible mistake.” Additionally, the author neglected to mention the disorganized nature of the 3-day draft, naturally leading to some “mistakes.” Furthermore, Mr. Ratnam did not draft Bryant in the second, but rather sixth round.

    Mr. Lamsam’s trade of Klay Thompson for Tim Duncan was in fact a fair and even trade that was upheld by the league manager, Mr. Vijay Edupuganti (If the author had taken the time to examine the statistics of the two players in question, he would have found a very equal stat matchup, despite the differences in position).

    Mr. Iyengar is not, in fact, “the sole member of the league who does not set his lineups,” as Mr. Ratnam’s recent win over Mr. Cheng was due to a lack of diligence in setting his lineup. Additionally, the author listed Mr. Haugh’s team as “not half bad.” However, he was included with the teams under .500, and actually has a victory percentage of .500 exactly (record of 5-5-3), and therefore is indeed literally “half bad.” Furthermore, the author failed to include a decimal before your 500 in the above article, and since 500 is not a proportion, percentage, or decimal, every team is under 500 wins.

    The author states that Mr. Hiraki’s team had a terrible “star” to the season, when in fact the word used should have been “start.” I would expect a journalist affiliated with such a renowned publication as this to properly proofread and edit his article before publishing. The author’s claim that Mr. Halsey’s team is “not good at all” is purely subjective and ideally such a statement should be withheld from a “factual” article such as this. Furthermore, Mr. Halsey has indeed been subject to the “injury bug,” since Wade has missed a total of 40 games this season and Mr. Halsey was forced to release Shawn Marion from his team due to excessive injury.

    The author claims it “shouldn’t be hard” to discern the true owner of the ACBREEZY15 ISLANDERS. However, without giving readers context and additional information, it is in fact hard to determine the owner of said team. The author’s assumption we are already cognizant of such facts seems to me to be a lack of foresight and sensitivity to outside groups – aspects which could be considered detrimental to the reputation of this publication. Additionally, the assertion that the ACBREEZY15 ISLANDERS have “cooled off” seems to be rather redundant and unnecessary considering the majority of this nation has been engulfed in a polar vortex.

    The author asserts that the Asia division in the league you examined is “rather meh.” Not only is this description potentially racist and insensitive, it is also rather vague and does not give the reader any idea as to the true state of the division. The author’s inclusion of the phrase “so maybe he can rebound” is disappointing. Such an esteemed publication should refrain from allowing its journalists to include such tasteless puns, especially so frequently in a single article.

    The author claims that his team is “looking at a bright future,” a pointless assertion giving the days are getting progressively longer and brighter as the summer solstice approaches.

    Finally, if the author had done research, he would know that Mr. Edupuganti actually has multiple (successful) fantasy golf teams. Ultimately, this article has numerous holes in its chain of logic and its assertions, and it is recommended that the author remedy the aforementioned issues.

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