Lunch Review by Brian Eisner


  • Monday: According to the menu, it was “pasta pasta pasta”. Well, I only noticed one type of pasta up there, so shouldn’t have it just been pasta? Anyways, pasta’s always good, so that’s, well, good! 8/10
  • Tuesday: Ah, orange chicken, a regular. I don’t know how many people would go for that though, especially when the other bar contained tacos! Although they did run out of shells before I could get there; that is unacceptable! 7/10
  • Wednesday: All I can say is: looking good! Vietnamese food is always good, so the Vietnamese bar is sure to be awesome. At the main bar, we have…*drum roll please*…OES garden herb roasted chicken drumsticks!  8/10
  • Thursday: BBQ pork ribs were great, if you’re not a vegetarian that is. Since the other bar doesn’t have any vegetarian options either, that really knocks today’s ranking down. 4/10
  • Friday: Pizzacato pizza…on a day we’re not here. Really? 0/10 for that. I guess dorm students can enjoy it, so 10/10 for them.

Nathan Carpenter by Abe Asher

In the wake of the thoroughly deserving Nathan Carpenter being voted the 2014 Patty Jean Semura Award winner, I collected thoughts from Nathan’s teachers and peers on the great man himself.

On Nathan at large:

“A good guy.”

“A man who uses humor to connect lives.”

“A delightful mix of Zach Galifianakis and Will Ferrell……. But so much better than that terrible movie they did together.”

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BASEBALL!!!!!!!!! by Brian Eisner

If you weren’t aware, the MLB’s opening day was on Monday (well, technically it was earlier, but for the vast majority of teams, it was Monday)! Whether your favorite team is the Seattle Mariners, the Los Angeles Angels, the Pittsburgh Pirates, or, god forbid, the St. Louis Cardinals or the Boston Red Sux, the opening day of the season is always an exciting time. Of course, the two biggest positives were than the Mariners won and the Red Sux lost. That’s enough to cheer me up for an entire day.

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The Spring Sky by John Connall

Now that Oregon might actually have clear skies at night, astronomers statewide are out with their telescopes and binoculars. But even if you don’t have a scope, you can still enjoy the night sky from as close to home as your front yard. To help you with the effort of exploring our infinite universe, I’ll be publishing this article weekly as a guide to the constellations and planets in case you get that urge to look up.

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PSA: College Decisions by Brian Eisner

    If you’re a senior (or even if you’re not), you’re probably aware that most seniors have now heard back from all colleges that they applied to. Note to all non-seniors: if it wasn’t obvious, don’t incessantly question us about our where we got into or where we are going. While some of us (including myself) may not mind, there are plenty of us who don’t exactly want to talk about it. So here’s the golden rule: unless you see a Facebook notification about what school a senior is going to, or if they volunteer the information in some other way, then don’t talk to them about it.

March Madness by Abe Asher

After spending the first Thursday of the NCAA Tournament frantically refreshing the SportsCenter app in the Houston airport and begging the shambolic March Madness Live to do its job, I am keeping a diary of Friday of the tournament – basking in the glory of some 12 straight hours of buzzer-beaters, shredded brackets, cheering for guys named Shelly and Frank from schools like Nebraska and New Mexico, and generally licking my wounds.

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Lunch (p)review: by Brian Eisner

  • Monday: WHY DID WE MISS A HOT DOG BAR????????? I guess it is a good thing that we didn’t have school on opening day; it allowed me to think about baseball all day.
  • Tuesday: Well, we had pasta here…turned out to be pretty good, even with no Alfredo sauce. Gyros are a rather disputed food, but for those who don’t like pasta, it’s a nice alternative. Also, PSA: if you cut the line, then you are a massive idiot. 7/10
  • Wednesday: We’ve got yet more broccoli beef, a lunch regular. It’s not as bad as people say, even if you go with the broccoli tofu instead! Brazilian turkey will be present at the other bar…certainly new. 6/10
  • Thursday: Sloppy Joes for all you non-vegetarians out there. Vegetarian Sloppy Joes are an alternative…never tried one though, so I can’t comment on it. A…salad bar as the world bar? We already have one though! 7/10
  • Friday: Cheese ravioli! And TexMex on the same day! Hard to beat this! 9/10