by Annie Watson
It’s been a while. Here’s 5 community questions 100% asked by people who are not me.
What’s your least favorite food?
Have you ever had packaged cheese that comes already sliced?
It’s great to put straight on sandwiches, and it eliminates the all too common temptation to depict God’s physical form through cheese carving so naturally felt when using a knife.
Anyway, I have no problem with the odd numbered slices, it’s just the even ones that bug me. The contrast in colors is nice, the alternating pattern is pleasing, the shape is correct, but they honestly taste like cheese-scented pieces of paper. The texture is awful. It probably seems specific and weird to complain about, but even numbered cheese slices are definitely my least favorite food. Or maybe peanuts. It’s a toss up.
Do you have any nicknames?
Yep. Here’s a list.
- Anniekin Skywatson
- Pretty much any girl’s name that starts with an A (Anastasia, Antonina, Asbestos, Annabelle, Anaplastic Thyroid Cancer, etc.)
- Chandler’s Sister
- Girl Watson
- Salad Dressing Goddess
- The Person Jacque Rheingans Owes $16.00 in Damages (you know what you did)
Tell me a secret.
Couldn’t decide, so here’s a few. Just to mess with everyone, I’ve included two lies.
- I hid in a refrigerator during hide and seek once, and drank over half a bottle of chocolate syrup.
- I got stuck in a baby swing at age 10 and Chandler has footage of the incident.
- I impulsively bought Spider-Man boxers at Target and they’re the best thing that’s happened to me in months.
- I found a human jaw in my attic.
- When I was seven, I had no idea the microphone in the chapel at my church connected to speakers in the bathroom, and for like 3 seconds, I thought God was talking to me.
- I really like getting my blood drawn. Low-key hope I get to every time I’m at the hospital.
- I’ve never had Chinese food.
- I’m Oesmemes.
- I get recurrent dreams/nightmares involving teletubbies, and I selfishly hope I’m not alone.
- I’ve never willingly worn a hat.
What’s in your refrigerator?
Unique question. Pretty much just some fruit, eggs, sour cream, and cool whip. Oh and leftovers.
Sorry for the mess. I’ve been really busy so I have yet to clean it out. Chandler offered to lend a hand, but I’m fine.
Wendy from my house writes:
Do you want to come home at 4:30 or 5:00?
I’m not coming home tonight. The teen street fighting match ran late, so I’ve decided to sleep off the pain in the lost and found bin, home of like 30+ jackets, a pair of gently used boxers, and an unwrapped Nutri-Grain® Bar. I really hope someone found it abandoned somewhere, scooped it up in their altruistic hands, stroked it whilst whispering gentle affirmations of its worth, and gingerly set it in the lost and found to be reunited with its owner, only to take two steps and whip back around because it’s small and might get cold, and should be swaddled in only the finest of forgotten jackets (i.e. the navy blue fur-lined Abercrombie I’ve been coveting since January). The Nutri-Grain® Bar and I have become fast friends, but if I can’t make these 63.916 hours without food, I will not hesitate to snap its neck and eat its likely expired flesh.
See ya on Monday?